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First in line is for chumps

Reflecting back on the last three movies I saw in an actual theatre the average number of people in the audience  with me probably averaged around 4. Not too surprising given my penchant for decompressing from a full day of work and kids by catching an 11pm showing of a movie in around week 12 of theatrical release on a random Tuesday at our local cineplex. I actually had one night when it was just me in the theatre and at first I imagined I was the total “playa” in my own private theatre but it sort of creeped me out. Man killed in theatre. No witnesses sort of thing. Body not discovered for weeks due to light audience turnout.

The point is I could have seen the movie opening night and fought off throngs of people but why is it so important to be first? Star Trek was just as good in June as it was during memoral day weekend and Matthew McConaughey’s wooden overacting style is just as bad in week 3 as it is in week 1 of release. It would be more dramatic to say something like week 10 of release but have you ever seen a Matthew McConaughey movie last more than 3 weeks lately? Keep those bongos handy my friend.

Beyond movies, you hear about the people that line up for a week or more outside the local best buy to be the first to get their hands on the latest gadget.  Hey Mr Gadget, how you liking that overpriced, underperforming, battery sucking first generation iPhone that you just had to have before everyone else and took 3 days to activate? One day that will go great with your Zune MP3 player and that 32 inch Sony Plasma you bought in 2002 that cost you $10K . I just picked up a 46 inch version for under a grand.

I learned my lesson early in life on the pitfalls of being on the cutting edge. In 1978 my father marched down to the store to buy our first VCR. The Betamax vs VHS format war was in full swing and it wasn’t clear yet which side was going to win. What finally made my fathers decision was a special offer of a year’s free video rentals if he purchased the Betamax unit. Little did he realize that there was probably only 20 titles at the time that were available in Betamax  so I spent the next year switching between Star Wars and Jaws rentals. I choose not be kind and rewind that year. My father never learned his lesson and followed up that act that Christmas by purchasing the Intellivision home video game system. Never heard of it? Came out about 3 months before Atari….exactly.

So keep taker those flyers on first year quarterbacks that can’t miss in your fantasy football pool (sorry that Brady Quinn pick you made didn’t work out that well) and Twittering your whereabouts every 4.6 seconds. I’m going to check into this thing they call Netflix.

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